Hard Truths
by sammy1026
Summary: Set during 4.09


Set during Season 4 Ep 9

Thanks to everyone for the kind feedback. Next up after this will be 4.05

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The minute she came through the door at headquarters Catherine's eyes landed on Steve, leaning over the smart table looking intently at some new piece of information. She could tell immediately something wasn't right. Most people wouldn't have noticed that his back was a little more rigid, or that his jaw was a little more tense, than usual.

Catherine wasn't most people.

When he called her from the car on his way to HPD to let her know what was going on, he wondered aloud how his Aunt Deb could have managed to get herself arrested only hours after arriving on the island. Catherine couldn't imagine it had been anything serious.

She quickly crossed the room and stood next to him.

"Everything ok?"

He indicated his office with a slight nod of his head and she followed him in. He leaned against the front of his desk, shoulders sagging slightly and she moved to stand directly in front of him.

"Steve, what's wrong? Did something happen at the jail? Is your aunt ok?"

"She's doing as well as can be expected."

"What happened?"

"She was picked up trying to buy marijuana from an undercover agent."

"What?" Granted Catherine didn't know Steve's Aunt Deb, had never even met her actually, but from everything Steve had told her about the sacrifices Deb made to raise Mary, and how hard she tried to keep Mary on the straight and narrow, this seemed out of character.

"Apparently she went to a dispensary but they wouldn't take an out-of-state card."

"Why does your aunt have a medical marijuana card?"

"That was exactly what I asked."

"And?"

"She tried to claim it was for cataracts but I could tell she was lying."

"So what's it really for?" Judging by Steve's demeanor she was pretty sure she knew the answer. She hoped, for his sake, she was wrong.

"She has cancer. It's a brain tumor."

"Oh, Steve. I'm so sorry."

She stepped into his arms without a second thought and he accepted the hug gratefully. They were normally very careful about PDAs in the office but he was willing to make an exception this time. He desperately needed the comfort of her embrace. He wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her hair.

"It's bad, Cath. Really bad."

She gave him a reassuring squeeze then stepped back slightly, taking both of his hands in hers and looking him directly in the eyes. "Ok, what we need is a plan. We need to find a specialist. I'll make a few calls, find out who the best doctor in this field is. Then we'll get her an appointment. "

Steve smiled at her. This was his Catherine. Never one to sit back when someone she cared about needed help. He knew she'd move heaven and earth to come up with a plan of action to fight this. Unfortunately that wasn't what Deb wanted.

"She's refusing any chemo or radiation. She wants to enjoy whatever time she has left ,not spend it sick in the hospital."

"Is she sure?"

"She says she is."

Catherine's natural inclination was to face any problem head on. To fight as hard as possible. But she had no idea what she'd do in Deb's position. She didn't think anyone could really know until they were faced with the question themselves.

"I don't know what to say, Steve. I'm not sure what I'd feel if I was in her shoes. If a doctor I trusted told me there was absolutely no hope…."

Steve stiffened and cut her off. "Please….don't talk like that…I don't want to think….not today."

"Are you ok?" Catherine asked, tilting her head slightly.

"Yeah, I'm sorry." He smiled what he hoped was a reassuring smile. "I just…I'm a little thrown by the news."

"That's completely understandable. What do you need me to do?"

"Deb insisted on getting booked in. She said she didn't want it to look like she was getting any special treatment."

Catherine smiled. That sounded like a very McGarrett-like thing to do.

"Could you please go down and pick her up and take her back to the house. Get her settled a little. Make sure she's comfortable."

"Of course. I saw her suitcase at the house this morning when I went back to change after you called about the case. I wasn't sure what to do with it…I mean to say I wasn't expecting….." Catherine trailed off.

"What?"

"Do you want me to find somewhere else to stay tonight? I have Kono's spare key. I've been keeping an eye on her place while she's gone. I could sleep there."

Steve looked completely baffled. "Why would you have to find somewhere else to sleep?"

"I wasn't sure what you had told your aunt…if she knows we are….what I mean is if she's aware….."

Steve laughed. "You know, you so seldom get tongue tied I almost forgot how much fun it is to watch. I'm tempted to just let you keep going and see how long it lasts. But we have a bit of situation to deal with so I'm gonna go ahead and stop you. I'm sure Mary has filled Aunt Deb in on the fact that you live there. And if she hasn't, I will."

"The guest room is a mess. All the stuff from my locker at the base that I haven't had time to go through yet is in there. And some boxes of stuff from my old apartment I keep hoping might just disappear someday so I don't have to deal with them. Plus the bed is so small and uncomfortable. Your aunt can't sleep in there. Especially if she's not feeling well."

"That's a good point. Tell you what, why don't we put Deb in our room. You and I will make do with the guest room. It's only for a few nights. Or worse comes to worse I'll share the couch with you, if you promise not to take up too much room," Steve smirked.

"Smartass. Are you sure you don't want some family time? I know you haven't seen your aunt in a while."

"I do want some family time. Which is why I want you to stay."

Catherine bit her lower lip. "Sometimes you say the sweetest things."

"Don't tell anyone. It'll ruin my reputation."

"Don't worry, your secret is safe with me."

"Thanks. Besides…. the only way you're getting out of there tonight is if you take me with you. So buckle up. Between my slightly crazy aunt, my completely crazy sister and the baby—who knows what will happen."

Catherine nudged him playfully. "I'll run home and change the sheets on the bed and put fresh towels in the bathroom then swing by HPD and pick her up."

"Thanks, Cath."

She gave his hands a squeeze then headed towards the door before turning around with one last thought..

"Ummmm….Steve?"

"Hmmm?"

"You said she got picked up trying to make a buy."

"Right." Steve rolled his eyes.

"Do you want me to make a few calls and see if I can get her a little something to hold her over for a few days? She must need it if she was willing to try to buy it outside of a dispensary situation."

"You mean you wanna score some pot for my aunt?"

"Well I was thinking more along the lines of calling in a favor from a sympathetic doctor, not meeting my dealer in the back alley, but yes."

"Do people even buy pot in back alleys anymore?"

"Be serious. Do you want me to make some calls?"

"I hadn't even thought of it but, yeah, that'd be great. Just don't….you know…I don't want to get another call from HPD and have to go down and bail you out too."

"I'll do my best," she smiled as she headed out the door.

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"Are you ok?" Mary asked impatiently as Deb and Catherine came through the front door. "What in the world happened? Steve called and said you'd been arrested."

"There's nothing to worry about, sweetie, it was just a big misunderstanding," Deb assured her.

"I shouldn't have left you out shopping alone but I needed to bring Joan home for a nap if there's any chance of us having a peaceful dinner tonight. I should have made you come with me."

"Stop fussing, honey. I'm fine. No harm done. I took a lovely mug shot. Far better than my driver's license photo."

"But what did you get arrested for?" Mary asked. When Deb didn't answer she turned to Catherine. "What did she…"

"You know what, it's nothing to worry about. It was just a misunderstanding. Everything will work itself out."

Deb had confided on the way back to the house that Mary didn't know about her diagnosis yet. Catherine knew that if Mary heard about the marijuana it wouldn't take long to put two and two together.

"Why don't I take your bag upstairs for you, Deb. You can freshen up and relax for a while before time to eat."

"Eat what?" Mary asked. "I still have no idea what we're serving for Thanksgiving dinner."

"Something will work out. It always does," Catherine said as she grabbed Deb's suitcase and started up the stairs.

Deb followed behind her. "I don't want to put anyone out," she insisted. "I can go to a hotel."

"Nonsense. It's no trouble at all. You can stay in here," Catherine reached the top of the stairs and crossed into the master bedroom. She lifted Deb's suitcase onto the bottom of the bed. "There are clean towels in the bathroom and…" she hesitated, fidgeting nervously.

"What?"

"I called in a favor from a friend. An ex-Navy doctor. I got him to write you a prescription for something to hold you over till you get home." Catherine handed Deb the bag with the dispensary logo on it.

Deb was taken aback. "That was….you didn't have to….thank you," she said sincerely. "That was very thoughtful of you. "

"You're welcome. Glad I could help. If you need anything else please let me know," Catherine smiled.

"I will." Deb placed the bag on the bedside table. "As tempted as I am to just crawl in bed and take a nap I guess we should get back downstairs and see what we can rustle up for dinner."

"As much as I'd like to stay and help, I really do have to get back to work. But you can call my cell or Steve's if you need anything. Mary has the numbers."

"Oh that's too bad. I was hoping we'd get chance to know each other a little better."

"We'll talk later," Catherine said as they descended the stairs. "I promise."

"I'll hold you to that," Deb smiled as they reached the living room. "Right now I think I'll make a nice cup of tea, sit on the lanai and brainstorm what to do about dinner."

"Sounds good," Mary agreed. "I'll grab the baby monitor and be right out.

As Deb disappeared into the kitchen Mary turned to Catherine. "She wants to get to know you better. You know what that means."

"What?"

"She's sizing you up. Making sure you're good enough for her nephew."

"I think she's just being polite."

Mary was undeterred. "Don't worry," she whispered conspiratorially. "I'll put in a good word for you. I'll start off by telling her how spiritual you are," she said with a devilish smile.

"Spiritual?"

"Yeah, you know, 'Oh God', 'Oh God', 'Oh God'."

"I'm never gonna live that down am I?" Catherine blushed.

"Not as long as I'm still drawing breath," Mary laughed.

###################################################################################

Danny and Steve hung back a little as everyone gathered their things to leave the restaurant after a very enjoyable, if hastily thrown together, Thanksgiving dinner.

"This was fun," Danny said as he watched Grace coo at Joan, keeping her amused while Mary gathered up all the assorted paraphernalia needed to keep a baby occupied during dinner in a restaurant and put it in the diaper bag.

"It was," Steve agreed. "Thanks again for the advice. It may take me some time to accept the way Deb has decided to handle this, but you're absolutely right. It's her decision. All I can do is try to make as many good memories as possible so both Mary and I will have something to hold on to."

"I know it's tough, babe. I'm here if you need to talk."

"Thanks. I appreciate that. And I want you to know that because you came through with this good advice I'm going to forgive you for your little transgression this morning."

"What transgression? What are you talking about."

"Don't play dumb with me."

"I'm not playing anything. I have no idea what you mean."

"This morning at the game…"

"I remember the game. I remember you running out when the score was tied because you couldn't trust Mary to put the turkey in the oven. I remember no transgression of any kind on my part."

"I can be the bigger man, Danny. I can let it slide. This one time. But….."

Steve pointed to his own eyes, then to Danny's in the universal sign for 'I'm watching you.'

"Did you hit your head at some point today? I mean it. I have no idea what you're talking about."

"I saw you grab Catherine's ass this morning."

"What the hell?"

"When you picked her up to carry her to the end zone. You totally grabbed her ass."

"I did not…."

Steve raised his eyebrows with doubt.

"It was the heat of the moment in the midst of competition, Steven. I'm admitting nothing….but if I did perchance….well let me just say it was an inadvertent ass grab."

Steve continued to look doubtful.

"It was," Danny insisted.

"I'll let it go this time, Danno. Just don't let it happen again."

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Steve sat on the beach with Aunt Deb, both of them relaxed and watching the ocean waves lap gently at the shore.

"Tonight was really great, Steve. Thanks for arranging it." Deb may have been reticent at first, but once she warmed up to the idea of getting on stage she really had a lot of fun.

"You're welcome. It was my pleasure."

"That was a heck of a backup plan."

"What can I say? Planning for all contingencies is part of my nature," he smiled softly.

"There are some things you can't plan for, Steve. They sneak up on you and no matter how well you think you've planned, you aren't ready for them."

"Aunt Deb. I have to ask you one more time. Are you sure this is the way you want to handle this?"

"I'm sure."

"Because if it's about money, or contacts, we can deal with that."

"Thank you but it's not about that. I've seen the best doctors. Gotten second and third opinions. They all say the same thing. Any treatment at this point would do very little good. I don't want to spend whatever time I have left in hospitals dealing with the after effects of chemo. I want to enjoy myself."

"I just feel like there should be something we can do."

"I know you do but, trust me, there's nothing. I've made my peace with this, Steve. You need to do the same."

"I'm trying."

"You know it's funny. We always think we have plenty of time. Even at my age…before I got sick…I was always putting things off. Thinking I'd do them later. When I started feeling sick I thought to myself—well whatever this is I'll just deal with it and then get on with my life.

Then they ordered tests and more tests and I started to get a bad feeling. I was sitting at home one afternoon and the phone rang. It was my doctor telling me I have cancer. It's funny how you can live a whole lifetime and then everything changes with one phone call."

"Yeah." Steve blinked hard. He certainly did understand that.

"I know this came as a shock. I'm sorry I had to tell you that way." Deb laid her hand on Steve's forearm.

"Don't worry about it," he assured her.

"My plan was to wait until tomorrow so we could have a nice Thanksgiving dinner without this hanging over our heads. But sometimes life has other plans."

"That it does," Steve agreed. "I'll do whatever it is you need me to do, Aunt Deb. I just need to get my head around the whole situation."

"It'll take time. But you need to get there. You're going to need to be strong for Mary. And her for you. The two of you are going to need each other."

"I love Mary but our relationship is….complicated. Mutual support has never really been the order of the day. More like me constantly bailing her out of trouble. Usually trouble of her own making."

"Have you ever opened up to her and given her a chance to be there for you?"

"Probably not," Steve admitted.

"You have to try to give her a break. I know she's had her issues, and she can be flighty and impulsive, but being a Mom is changing her. Still…it isn't gonna happen all at once. Letting her know you believe in her will make a world of difference."

"I'll try, but if I stop giving her a hard time she won't know what's going on," Steve smirked.

"You're both too stubborn for your own good."

"You are not the first person to suggest that."

"You two are more alike than you think. Help her, and let her help you."

"I promise I'll try."

"You need to find balance in your life, Steve. Luckily you have Catherine around to help with that."

"Yeah."

"She's a good…."friend" is it?"

"Oh please, not you too."

"Listen, Steve. Cancer has given me perspective. Words are just words."

Steve smiled.

"As long as the two of you are clear about the feelings, the words don't matter. But sometimes we put off saying things because we think we have time. "

"I know that."

"Tomorrow isn't guaranteed for any of us."

"I appreciate your concern but Catherine and I are fine. "

"Are you sure?"

"I'm positive."

"Ok. I'll take your word for it."

"Thanks, Aunt Deb."

"Still, sometimes girls like to hear the words. I'm just saying."

"I'll keep that in mind."

"Your partner told me the two of you are insane and can't use simple words."

"Danno is in no position to be judging other people's sanity."

"Look I've known Catherine less than a day but I….I mean she's….did you know she got me a prescription to hold me over till I get back to LA?"

"Yes, I did."

"That's was very thoughtful of her to do that."

"Catherine is a very thoughtful person."

"Yes she is. And beautiful."

"Very."

"And smart."

"What is this we're doing right now?"

"I'm just pointing out, there are many men who would find a woman like her attractive."

"Many men do."

"Don't wait too long. She might leave you for a man with no gray hair or tattoos."

"You're incorrigible."

Deb laughed. "I think the day and all the travel are finally catching up with me. I better turn in before I fall asleep here on the sand." She kissed him on the cheek before standing up and heading for the house. "Night Steve."

"Night, Aunt Deb."

Steve looked over his shoulder and smiled as he saw Catherine approaching.

Night, Catherine," Deb said as they passed.

"I'm not chasing you off, am I?" Catherine asked.

"No, you've been great. I'm just tired."

Catherine slipped her phone into her pocket and sat down next to Steve as Deb made her way back to the house.

"How are your folks?"

"Fine I guess. Still a little testy about me leaving the Navy without talking it over with them first."

"You ok?"

"Yeah. They'll either get over it or they'll be pissed for a long time. How about you? Today's been kind of a rollercoaster for you, hasn't it?

"Yeah. But all things considered it's been a good day. I have a lot to be thankful for."

Catherine smiled. "We both do."

"C'mere," Steve said, pulling her closer and draping his arm across her shoulders. "You made quite an impression on my Aunt Deb."

"Really?"

"Yes. She almost seems to be of the opinion you could do better than me."

Catherine laughed out loud. "Well clearly she's been nibbling on those brownies I got her."

"You know I was thinking," Steve got a little more serious. " Aunt Deb really doesn't have any family other than Mary and me—and now the baby…and you," he smiled. "I was thinking I might talk to her about coming here to stay when things start to…you know…get a little worse. When she needs someone around all the time."

"I think that would be a great idea. She could stay here with us and that way Mary and the baby could stay whenever they want. Or if she needs a little more privacy we could find her a small apartment close by."

He pulled her in for a kiss, then wrapped her in his arms and breathed in the scent of her. "Thanks, Cath. I mean it. Just…thanks."

"Anytime. Now we've both had a long day and I think we need some sleep. So which is it gonna be? Small uncomfortable bed or big couch?"

"Doesn't matter to me. Wherever you go just look beside you, I'll be right there."


End file.
